Circus Tent. Encouraged To Exersize.

I fell asleep in my recliner chair and began dreaming very lucid
and real type dreams today.

In the dream I was in the living room where my recliner chair is. I had cleared out some of the furniture in the dream to provide room for exercising. Suddenly a strip of linoleum was there and I was using some sort of wheeled device in both my hands and I would fall straight down on the floor as the devices made me roll out straight then Id lift back up. All while I was doing that there was an older plump motherly black woman behind me urging me on to keep on keeping on to get stronger and healthier. She seemed to be rather concerned for me.

Outside the living room window it was a bright sunny summer day and a circus tent of some sort was set up. I was wondering if anyone was gonna camp in my yard. I was worried that my husband would be angry that the circus tent was put up butted up to our house corner and yard.

All during the dream I kept having fear that my husband would come home from work and be angry over the circus tent and activities going on outside our house. I heard the back door open and heard his footsteps coming in, but I never saw him. It was so real I woke up thinking he was home as I felt the doom that comes with worrying about someone getting upset.

Recent Happenings and The Evergreen Airplane Dream

I haven't been blogging a lot of my recent dreams and visuals.
I was in the hospital for a week which didn't help any.

I am concerned that the past few months my dreams have not been as prophetic
as they normally are. Someone suggested that perhaps that might be because God is
increasing me in another gift while the seer gifting rest. I don't know, it's possible.

I've had rather bad stress going on which hasn't been helping my health lately nor anything else so perhaps that too might be interfering with my dreams and visuals?

Nevertheless I'm still here, alive, breathing and enjoying the Creator's creations.

Last night I dreamed that I was inside a very large airplane that was grounded. I saw my youngest unbuckled and I got after her to put her seat belt on. Inside the plane it had levels like an upstairs. Inside it did not look like a plane with rows of seats. The upstairs had a store section where my one niece's husband was in charge of doing the selling and trading. I traded him a large jar of brand name peanut butter for 2 eggs that he had already broke into a container. In my dream I was thinking that it was an unfair trade.

Outside of the plane window I saw a large forest growing along the coast but I did not see the body of water. The plane seemed to be parked on the beach or close to it.
On the outskirts of the forest was a massive giant thick tall evergreen tree that was bigger then any I've ever saw in the waking world. It was the only one like it as it stood amongst 1000s of non-evergreen trees. It would sometimes bend down all the way to the ground like it was falling, then it would suddenly stand back up tall and strong. It seemed as though the wind was blowing only it down then it would come back up.
Most folks could not see that happening even though they were also looking out the window although a few people did see it including a middle aged man on the plane.

Part of the time There was a roller coaster somewhere outside of the plane that people were riding.

What does it all mean? I have an idea on a few things but at this time I don't know for sure. I just know it stands out in my memory.

Wind Walker

Wind Walker is the name recently given to me by my friend whom is a Christian Miami Indian elder.
He felt it impressed upon him that my name is to be Wind Walker because I am so sentivite to the Holy Spirit "riding the wind" with Him walking with Him.
It is humbling to say the least. Am I worthy of such a name and description?
I cant help but to think that Im not good enough for such a meaningful name
due to how imperfect I am. I have sinned. I make mistakes. I get caught up in wrong mindsets. etc. But seriously does all that matter down deep?

King David of the Bible was a horrid sinner who killed and cheated and seemed to keep messing things up. But even so he still had a heart for the Lord relying on Him and trusting in Him and being willing to be His servent and used by Him. And God blessed him mightily for that despite Kind David's many errors.
I do not claim to come even close to being like Kind David or anyone else. I am me the me God made me to be.
It's humbling to know that my words and actions carry more weight then I thought they did.

Such a responsibility that I have failed at so many times :(
But every time that I call out to Jesus to lift me up and help me pick myself back up
He does. He never leaves my side saying things like:
 "well, she really messed that up I'm done with her!"
Instead He keeps on loving us giving us new chances.
Can I ride the Wind well enough?
Can I walk with the Wind well enough?
Not in my own human understanding and strength I cant. But in Him and His strength I can.
 Servant of the Lord,
Wind Walker
----------------------Click below link for the song "Ride The Wind" by Broken Arrows.---------------
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VF7VvoM9Vwo

Seer Training Elder Confirmation

Wow, how things finally work out!

All of my life I've known I wasn't like everyone else. I tend to see things way out of the box while most others see with in the box. I don't tend to look on things like most others do. I am my own person independent.

Others know I'm "different".

It seems as though most people can only handle me in small doses. I don't talk to most others about the things I see and feel.  I don't say things to freak them out and stuff like that.

I've always known my dreams have been potent and amazing. So real like full of things people cant believe.

I lived 41 years with God training me slowly over time showing me things which I now know was preparing me for when the time was right. Then this year a month before I turned 42 God lead me to a group of Christians who would not think I was a nut and would discern things about me. They, especially the preacher, helped me via the knowledge of God. One thing lead to another and my God given gifting began increasing and growing and now I am friends with a Miami Indian Chief Elder who is a Godly man and Prophet going to my church.

He confirmed tonight that I am a seer as I had expected. He is slowly going to be helping train me. And the extra exciting fact is that he is respectful and loving to the Native ways since he too is Native. It takes a Native to get a Native.

A Godly for real Prophet training me in the seer gifting whom is also a Native like myself. Yeah, way to cool hey?

He said God will restore all that satan as taken from me over my lifetime. God will heal the broken and lonely heart. The poor health. The money issues. All is to be restored.

My God given seer gifting is to be increased big time.

To good to be true?

My heart is happy.

My Odd Ball DNA

For several weeks now I've been seeing what appears to be DNA strands such as the picture I posted above. I see them turning around.

I posted this in an online prophetic Christian group. The response is there too:

I posted:
"For about 2 weeks now I've been seeing what appears to be DNA strands like the picture below. Why might this be?"

Someone responded with:
"God is showing you that you are one of a kind... a special creation made by Him. And just as the DNA strands determine every detail of who you are physically He is individualizing your spiritual life and has a specific purpose for you in His kingdom."

My response to that:
"what you said reached a part of my heart and made me cry out to the Lord for more help, strength and guidance. I believe you are 100% correct.
Last night at church someone said about the same thing to me without me saying anything about seeing the DNA strands.
People keep telling me Im one of a kind.
Some belittle me for being different.
Some like me for being different.
I fit in with every group and do not fit in with any group at the same time.
God has always used my differentness but now He is using it more and more.
I see Him working in me to befriend people others cant without me having to be preachy, pushy and Bible thumping.
Thank you :)"
----------------------------------------------------
Someone had just told me that last night and others have indicated it before too. I guess it confirms it to me. I had been realizing it slowly over time.

OK, so now am I using this "gift of differentness" correctly?

Last night an elder and prophet had said that I was the current spiritual authority over a friend I've been bringing to church and counseling with. I am not a pastor or anything like that so the words struck me deep and made me realize that I have got to make sure I'm taking things seriously and be careful of my actions and words so I don't cause spiritual harm to my friend and others I'm speaking with. Wow! Humbling and sobering! I've got to make sure I'm a good girl, lol.

Multiple times a day I've been having to cry out to the Lord for help. Am I giving the correct response to people? Am I doing it right? I worry about that kind of stuff.

I've always been the different one and people see and know it soon after meeting me it seems. Either they do or don't like me.

I let my freak flag fly I guess. And most people don't seem to care and in fact many like it.

Don't get me wrong I'm not saying I'm-all-that. I know I'm just as much of a sinner as anyone else is. I screw up like everyone else. But like every other Christian I have chosen Jesus and therefor He covers my screw ups and I get another chance to do it right.

I've known for a while that only I can take on the friendships of certain people that others can not. I see the beautify in the plants, people and environments that others cant. I know because of my different ways of thinking and my seemingly odd perspectives that I come across as a really different sort of person.

Sometimes it hurts and I feel lonely not having anyone else who understands. But this year 2013 God has been placing people in my path who feel similarly to me due to their special uniqueness. I'm not alone.

The Retangle With 4 Doors.

Out in the wooded wilderness there was a large rectangle outlined with trees.

On each side of the rectangle was a door each of a different color.
The colors were yellow, purple, white and black.
Here is what the doors opened up into:

Yellow door:  Opened into God's bounty such as flowers, fruits, water,
 greenery, trees, plants, etc. His lovely bounty. Bright day.

Purple door:  Opened into a room that had purple flooring and walls. In this room was gold and many wrapped gifts of various sizes, shapes and colors.

White door:  Opened into a room that contained a bright amazing bright, very bright white glowing light. It was so white it made it somewhat hard to see the angels all standing in a long line at the door waiting to be told what to do for God and when they get their job orders they go carry out His will. I believe since we are not to worship the angels that is why their presence is not strong enough to be seen clearly in that bright white glow. The Light is of the Lord, His amazing presence taking over. An amazing light that is so bright I cant describe it in words but the brightness does not hurt your eyes, it does not blind you.

Black door:  If it were to be opened it opens the door to hell with all the demonic influences rushing out to go do the bidding and will of their evil master. The door knob was jiggling. A demon was looking through the keyhole watching me. I knew that if I did or said something sinful/wrongful mindset, etc. that it would open that black door which gives the demonic world the spiritual authority to come cause us trouble. You know like anger, unforgivenss, lust, jealously, hatred, adultery, fornication, bitterness, easily offended, fighting etc.
It's ok to feel emotions but it is what we do with them that can get us into trouble. And when we do the wrong thing with those emotions and temptations we open that black door and give the evil ones the authority to do their destruction into our lives. Whenever you get those negative thoughts don't keep wallering in them. Instead pray about it, pray for direction and truth. Don't go talking to everyone about it because they only leads to them thinking negative about the person or situation. It's ok to talk about things but make it be a trusted godly person whom you know wont go blabber and judge. But sometimes some things need not to be said and should only be prayed about.

In the vision a bright white sword came out of no where and sliced off the door knob on the black door. Then a putty or cement or something was plastered over the keyhole so the vision of the evil spirits behind that door was blocked.

I turned my back to that black door and looked upon the other 3 doors which were open.
------------------------------------------
I know we cant be perfect. We sin, we screw up, we are imperfect. We need not live a legalistic life trying to always think and feel and do the perfect things in order to please God. That would not be joy would it? We cant have joy by living by tons of rules that our earthly flesh cant 24/7 obey. So don't live rigged.

But also don't go in the other direction and live too loosely thinking we can go do whatever we want because after all God loves us anyways and Jesus died for those sins so why not go do what I want? That too is a dangerous mind set to have, a spiritually deadly mind set.

I think both the legalistic and the loose living mindsets open the black door.

Poisonous snake lashing out.

Last night I dreamed that me and some of my family members were outside by this fruit tree during the almost dark hours and a mean nasty looking angry snake with a big head and big fangs was there in the weeds trying to lash out and bite at us. It's body wasn't big, it's head got bigger the longer I looked at it though.

I kept saying stuff like "it has fangs and that means it is a poisonous snake so get away from it!"

But no one would listen. They just stood there looking dumb and not listening. One person even went up to it to get a closer look at it as it tried striking out at him.

But for some reason the evil snake was not able to move its body from that spot which meant its reach was limited and unable to bite us.
----------------------------------------------

Isn't that so like how we humans are?

We don't always see the danger, sometimes we get closer to the danger as it keeps trying to strike us. Sometimes it actually does strike us and we suffer because of it. But there are many times when we have chosen to be protected and the enemy can not strike.

Hi Husband

This is just a test post to prove I am me to the he that is him who is reading this.

Say that 6 times very fast without messing up!

Black Fiery Horses and What Spiritual Gifts Look Like

Dream atmosphere:
Outdoors. No man made things around. A light to medium wooded landscape making it shady in the woods while sunny outside of the parameter of the woods. Dream was inside the woods where Im normally at due to in real life I get sun sick and cant be in the sunshine for long. Good weather. Not cold. Not hot. Trees had leaves and the ground didn't have greenery but the ground was dry and free from weeds, briers, etc.

The dream was long with many aspects to it but the part that was made intent, strong and memorable was the part about the gifts.

I was in spirit form and therefor able to "fly" around verses walking around. I was hanging out with whomever the unseen force was that I could hear speaking. It was giving out spiritual gifts/talents to people. Each gift was shaped as a colorful animal that had sheep wool for fur no matter what kind of animal it was. I saw lime green, orange, brown gifts and more. Each gift did not move or become alive at that point but there was the feeling that they would be later on down the road. Before the person was born their gift was discussed and given out to them and at some point the gift was handed to the hands of their spirit. I kept wondering what my gift was gonna be. It was not clear if this was before I was born or if it was a gift I was going to receive or already have yet.

We came down off of a little hill (still in the woods) where I would receive my gift. A team of pitch black horses with fire where their manes are and streaks of fire like lightening bolts going through their body came to a holt in front of the unseen forces that had been handing out the gifts. (the horses had suddenly appeared running to the location where we was at via running in the air until they halted on the ground)
The horses were standing 2 beside each other with 2 more behind them and it went on for I don't know how many rows. It looked like they do when you see a team of horses pulling a wagon in the movies , but they didn't have a wagon or reigns on them. Their bodies were free of confinement.

Their bodies froze in place and they bowed their heads low out of respect and honor to the unseen beings. While they were bowed low their fiery manes and steaks still gently flowed in the breeze and puffs of air could be occasionally heard from their nostrils just like with real horses. Their bodies became froze in place with the fire still flowing, puffs still puffing and their eyes could still move. As they bowed their heads in reverence their eyes were still able to look up at the unseen beings and they never took their eyes off the beings. It was as if they were awaiting instructions.

They were beautiful, shiny, memorizing not scary. I got the feeling that those horses could be used for good or bad depending on their training and owner. They were very impressive looking as they carried an air or respect, honor, authority, royalness but I didn't feel any fear. I just looked at them in awe.

I was confused wondering why this gift of mine was so very different then the others. Why was my gift so animated verses the other gifts?
--------------------------------------------------The end--------------------------------------

I asked my friend to please interpret the above dream if she felt led to. The below is what she came up with. The Holy Spirit is who gives the interpretation, she also used some definitions from the book  "Dreams Made Easy, Volume One" by Barb Dechant.

My friend's blog is here:
http://www.uncoverednomore.com/?q=blog/5
Below is the dream with her interpretations indicated via the "*" stars after the sections. My dream stuff in parenthesis.

The Interpretation Below:

"Dream atmosphere: Outdoors. No man made things around. A light to medium wooded landscape making it shady in the woods while sunny outside of the parameter of the woods. Dream was inside the woods where Im normally at due to in real life I get sun sick and cant be in the sunshine for long. Good weather. Not cold. Not hot. Trees had leaves and the ground didn't have greenery but the ground was dry and free from weeds, briers, etc."


*******My first impression is this is pre-curse, or post Armagedon, type place. And you are familiar with it because you have travelled in the spirit world before.******


"The dream was long with many aspects to it but the part that was made intent, strong and memorable was the part about the gifts."


***The Holy Spirit is showing you how you travel in this place sometimes, and that is why it was long. But at this time, He is showing you the current condition around you of gifting, and perhaps it is so you can direct knowledgeable prayer toward what He is about to show you.***

 

 

"I was in spirit form and therefor able to "fly" around verses walking around. I was hanging out with whomever the unseen force was that I could hear speaking. It was giving out spiritual gifts/talents to people. Each gift was shaped as a colorful animal that had sheep wool for fur no matter what kind of animal it was. I saw lime green, orange, brown gifts and more. Each gift did not move or become alive at that point but there was the feeling that they would be later on down the road. Before the person was born their gift was discussed and given out to them and at some point the gift was handed to the hands of their spirit. I kept wondering what my gift was gonna be. It was not clear if this was before I was born or if it was a gift I was going to receive or already have yet."



***This part reminds me of how the Psalmist says we are known before we are born. Flying is highly prophetic communication. The unseen voice may be angelic or the Holy Spirit. “Sheep wool” depicts the sheep Jesus speaks of in parables, and so I am guessing you need to intercede for gifting within the body of Christ (I am also understanding some of this “guess” from my own prayer journeys here lately because part of the reason I have suffered quite a bit with the ministry of UNM is because many people do not understand the spiritual gifts as Christians. There is a lot of ignorance, unbelief, and just general persecution which causes us to not be able to be free in the use of our giftings.) Brown: Compassion, humility; pastor; repentant; born again. Orange: Perseverance; powerful; strong; fire or passion of God; God’s protection; purification; angels; praise; intercession…Kiss of the Son (plus more…this is a heavily prophetic color evidently). Green: Growth; Prosperity; Conscience; Renewal. And the “Lime” could be a play on words….when you suck a lime, you will cringe. You are called to pray for these colorful qualities/gifts of the Holy Spirit to come forth and while these are wonderful things, the “renewal” may make some of us pucker as we are released because regenerative work to bring forth gifts we are born with can be painful though wonderful. Change is always a good, but laborious, process.
Everyone is born with gifting, and Satan’s warfare holds it down and makes many people, unbelievers and believers alike, very confused about their worth and/or what they are made to do. ***

 

"We came down off of a little hill (still in the woods) where I would receive my gift. A team of pitch black horses with fire where their manes are and streaks of fire like lightening bolts going through their body came to a holt in front of the unseen forces that had been handing out the gifts. (the horses had suddenly appeared running to the location where we was at via running in the air until they halted on the ground) The horses were standing 2 beside each other with 2 more behind them and it went on for I don't know how many rows. It looked like they do when you see a team of horses pulling a wagon in the movies , but they didn't have a wagon or reigns on them. Their bodies were free of confinement.

Their bodies froze in place and they bowed their heads low out of respect and honor to the unseen beings. While they were bowed low their fiery manes and steaks still gently flowed in the breeze and puffs of air could be occasionally heard from their nostrils just like with real horses. Their bodies became froze in place with the fire still flowing, puffs still puffing and their eyes could still move. As they bowed their heads in reverence their eyes were still able to look up at the unseen beings and they never took their eyes off the beings. It was as if they were awaiting instructions."

******Coming off the hill means you came down from the third heaven place of flying and went into the second heaven with your sight. "Frozen" means the giftings are frozen up and need to be released.
Black: Elegant, mystery or mysterious; Hidden wealth of wisdom. Horse: Power, authority, movement of God; Strength; Swiftness; Spiritual support; Powerful individual ministry; note the color of the horse. Since the horses were worshipping, I feel this is the Holy Spirit speaking to you. We do not worship angels though we are a little lower than them. The Apostle John did fall before an angel in Revelation, and the angel made him get back up. The fiery manes ties into the “orange” above, and it is the fire of the Holy Spirit, refining fire. It may help you to go read about the “godly horses” of Revelation to get further depth of meaning.*****

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"They were beautiful, shiny, memorizing not scary. I got the feeling that those horses could be used for good or bad depending on their training and owner. They were very impressive looking as they carried an air or respect, honor, authority, royalness but I didn't feel any fear. I just looked at them in awe. I was confused wondering why this gift of mine was so very different then the others. Why was my gift so animated verses the other gifts?"

***Gifting is given to all individuals, and it is used for the Lord or selfishly for the devil. If we look at Hollywood and the music industry we can see stark contrasts. Your gifting seems different than the others because you are very aware of your gifting, and others are not only unaware of their gifting but somewhat unbelieving towards others who operate in their gifting. Thus all the judgment/critical stances within the Christian churches. This is the condition of the body of Christ in the United States, and this may be why you were given this dream so you can pray. I have personally seen, and written about, how important it is to have a strong home culture to nurture gifting like you are seeing here so that the children, young adults, and even older people not used to using their gifting can begin to knowledgeably step out in faith and use what God created them with unto the glory of God and to bring in the harvest of the world. So many people don’t know their worth in God’s eyes, and that is so sad when what those of us who are prophetic see their worth. It is hard to communicate these sorts of nurturing things to people on a congregational (much less ministerial) level. This nurturing is a strong ministry for women in the home culture that is next to non-existent right now. This is why we have seen such a surge of the spirit of Jezebel when women teach mixed groups. It is because we have not been given our place of use and all people are generally suffering for it because the Christian women have been so chased out of the home culture and held down as women even within the Christian world.**

I hope that helps with your perspective, and I apologize in advance if I missed it anywhere in my interpretation. Love you! ~[her name here]

 

  

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lord Jesus I Cry Out To You For Guidence!

I thank the Lord for having Godly parents who raised me knowing about Jesus. Jesus is my strength, power and might. He gives me the ability to keep on keeping on rather well.

Creator's son (Jesus) is my Great Rescuer saving me from the hands of the enemy over and over.  No power is greater then He. And because I am His and He is mine I have the freedom to use His Power for my Protection.

Lord Jesus guide me please, guide me as I speak with these hurting people that also have "unaccepted" gifting and get thrown by the wayside because of it. Help me to show them You in a way that reaches deep down into their souls and opens the eyes of their spirit to The Truth and nothing but the Truth.

The enemy has a very strong hold on some of them because the churches have not understood prophetic gifting and have chased those types away mistaking them for being in error. So those types turned to evil and think they are doing good. Oh Lord Jesus give us all the Strength and Power to know what to do and say. I need You so much right now as I council with these strongly gifted people who are wounded and hurting souls. Guide me. Guide my words. Guide my thoughts. Guide my actions.
I need Your Devine Guidance especially right now. The lies of the enemy are so convincing. The lies lie making the people unable to see the Truth. Make them see You, unblind them right now, open their eyes to see You!

I ask that others pray with me and for me as well.

Quail and Eggs

Last night I had a long dream that had mostly nonsense in it.

But there was a short session of it all where I kept seeing those little bob white quails. In the dream I really wanted some quails just for the fun of it.

The one kept laying a ton of peas sized eggs.

Quails- tend to represent prosperity etc.

Egg- from what I read represent all the blessings is that the eggs mean a new life, blessings coming your way.

Quail Eggs

Last night's dream was long but for the most part just silly mundane things that I have already forgotten. Except for in one portion of the dream where I come across some quails. I had been wanting some for pets. I really really waned to buy one or two of the quail.

 In the dream the quail had laid many eggs tiny ones and many of  them. I held some of them in my right hand and began looking at them.

To me the quail is saying that I'm growing spiritually.

I think the tiny white quail eggs where representing the gifts for our spirit.
The End.

His Names Floating Up to Him / Anointed Music

Sometimes there are Christians who have a special anointing in their singing voices and their ability to play instruments. Their voice and music has the God made ability to touch ones soul and spirit in many ways. I do not have that gifting but I sure am thankful that some do. Natalie Grant's song "Your Great Name"  is one of those songs that for me I feel the anointing in it as it has touched me.
Here is a youtube link for it:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IuuLBPOYcI8

There has been times when Im playing this song that I lean my head back and close my eyes. Often times when I do that I see encouraging things to comfort me or something comforting about someone I know. I wish it were more acceptable in society to tell the person the comforting visions/mental videos/mental pictures I sometimes get about them although if done calmly, privately and in good timing with God's anointing there are times when I can do so.

One of the mental videos I got tonight while this song was playing was this:
 I was in the air (I guess?) where I could see the USA via being on the west coast and looking out over the land in all the 48 states main land. I could see all the names for God in thick white letters coming up from the country all over the place and going straight up to Him.

My position in the air changed and I was then able to see a thick wide bright white tunnel was connected to the earth were the USA is as if it were a vacuum sucking it up, the words gently kept going up through the tunnel until it reached Him. I was then seeing the world as I "floated" in space seeing the tunnel from the outside.

I was then inside the tunnel floating as the words kept coming. I could reach out to touch them. At one point I reached up and caught ahold of the name Jesus as it carried me along with it as it sprung white wings and started flying. It took me to the entrance of the tunnel where a very large hand reached out for me to sit on, the skin color of the hand was always changing looking like the skin colors of all the people on earth-black-white-red-yellow-brown.

Just like the song says "Your Great Name", those words were of the many ways we know Him as in all the languages and ways we call Him. They were the names of the Lord being spoke from His children and being gently drawn to Him as soon as they left the lips of His saints.

Since I am from the USA I saw it from that point of view but the names of the Lord float up all around the world in every country. They all reach Him, He receives them all. He knows them all. He hears you. He knows you. He loves you.

Suck It Up Butter Cup and Deflate That Big Head Of Yours and Lift Your Trodden Down Head To The Lord!

Are you wanting to be esteemed and held in high regard?

There is nothing wrong with needing some praise, respect and back patting. We all need encouraged and lifted up from time to time to help keep our moral boosted, but I warn you do not ever let it go to your head.

Never over praise a person unless you want to be the cause of their swollen heads.

When we float too high from swollen heads we will be brought down fast!

You WILL be wrong at times!

You WILL fail at times!

And all that is ok for no human can be 100% perfect.

When someone confronts you with your error take it like a man (or woman) and suck it up. Yeah, it hurts but suck it up buttercup because that is life. Pray about it and see what God has to say about it.

On the other side of the coin is those who are too humble never taking a pleasant 'thank you' and compliment. Being too humble is just of a spiritual sickness as being a big head is.

Go ahead and take a compliment, we all need them, but if you ever find yourself thinking you are better, smarter, that your gifting is better and that you know more then others then watch out because you are now a big head and big heads come down hard and painful! Knock it down a notch sista or brotha! Come back down to earth and relocate your mind!

Remember it is not you with the power. It is Him and only Him.

Agree to disagree respectfully and politely with others when needed. There is no need to argue or make them look bad because they don't see things your way. And just because someone does not agree with you does NOT mean they are disrespecting you! Get over yourself NOW and go on in whatever YOUR gifting is! You are loved no matter your gifting, no matter your mistakes, no matter your regrets!

Sometimes some people need to be humbled often because of how if they get too much power, money or a big following they become big heads taking the glory for themselves. And some never ever take a pat on the back as they waller in low self esteem and emotional filth. Neither is good!

For the too humble low self esteemed types: Pick up your head and old it high, not so high that you cant see those in front of you , but hold it up and look out before you. Look at what He has given you to do and go do it to the best of your ability not someone else's ability. No one is better then you. No one is worse then you. All is loved just like you.You are you the God made you as and as a child of God you must hold your head up and look straight out at your task and your blessings. You are not lowly trash! God don't make trash ya know!

Lord forgive me for having been guilty of both at times.

Look to Him.

Get Off Your Duff Churches!

It's about time churches start teaching the real Truth!

For centuries we in the west have been poisoned with a well meaning falsity.

No I don't think pastors are doing it on purpose. Most all of the pastors I've known truly love the Lord and preach to the best of their ability and they have did some mighty great things sacrificing much. Our churches have come to the rescue and helped so very many people and sent out missionaries all over the world to feed, medicate and teach people everywhere. This is a good thing!

But what are we missing?

We are missing togetherness in Truth and belief as we divide up into categories known as denominations all based off of man made interpretations and rules.

Rules made to control not bring others to Him.

Rules made to cause guilt and shame if not followed.

I'm so sick of it! Not all the gifts from the Holy Spirit are being accepted and used! Where and when did the church start going so blind?

The Bible clearly states that speaking on tongues is not wrong. No I'm not one to speak it much but I do know what the Bible says about it so therefor I believe it!

They rose the dead from the grave via the power of Jesus and Jesus said that we too could so why don't we see it?

They healed the sick so why cant we? Jesus is the same now and then so why cant we heal?

Did you know that in the poor countries they see healings? And why wouldn't they? They have no other alternative to turn to but the Lord, they don't have food and clothing banks along with food stamps and medicaid to pay for their health care needs. They have nothing but God so they turn to Him and He takes care of them.

We on the other hand have long since forgotten what it's like to heal and help people in the Grace of God causing miracles to happen. Where is our faith?

I'm sick of every time a Christian mentions that they had a dream or vision or that they spoke in tongues that they are considered as idiots in error. I'm so sick of the wimpy gospel where we have no Power to do a darn thing. Stand up and be a warrior for Jesus don't just go on living Powerless!

One of the greatest spiritual tragedies is churches no longer believing in the amazing super natural power of the Lord. There is a constant spiritual battle around us all the time. Rise up and fight! But we simply can not see it, we ration things away trying to make logical since of things when some times there is no logic or since to something because it is controlled by our enemy! Rise up warriors!

This does not mean we must blame everything on the enemy. Sometimes bad things just happen, but nevertheless you can stand and fight with the Power of Jesus! Nothing, and I mean nothing can beat Jesus!

I'm so sick off the Christians with a different sort of gifting getting thrown by the wayside as if their gifts don't matter and they are stupid. Not everyone is slated to sing, teach and preach ya know. Some of us are gifted differently and in a way others can not comprehend just as I cant comprehend how to sing and preach. Stop only allowing some gifts and ignoring others. Open your sickenly blinded eyes to the Truth and see that God is so much more then just a few gifts!

The time is now to get off your duff and know who you truly are in Him!

Don't look at the next person because they don't know what's up either. Instead look towards Him the Creator of all things.

He Just Blew Right On In!

As with a few previous posts I've mentioned how when I see that bright white light with a gold coloring I know it means God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit.

Tonight in my home has been some extra turmoil and troubles. I sat outside crying out for God to come help us.
I saw me in my ancient warrior outfit with that large bright white sword as I used it around and about the outside of my house in the air as if I were flying. I made big wide sweeping arches killing off the enemy wherever it resided on my house. Every where I swiped a bright white wide trail was left until the entire house and property was covered in it. Then I stood on top of the house holding the sword when a gentle wind literally blew in Jesus as He literally slid right in on the trail the wind blew Him in on until He stopped on the roof sitting down indian style and smiling as if to say "yeah My daughter, you kicked their butt didn't ya?"
I bowed down and presented Him with the sword I had killed the enemy with (demons) as He still had that good natured smile on His face.

"This is my gift to You Jesus"

He got up and twirled me around dancing with me all while keeping that smile on His face as He gently spun me until I went down through the roof and into the house where He looked down and in on me still smiling then left leaving the glowing bright white.

Bust A Move For Him!

So very often I have saw myself in a mental picture where I am praising the Lord with praise music via graceful dance.

In the dream I am able to swing, sway, twirl, hop, spin and dance to perfection as my spirit does so for Him.

In real life I am not a dancer and am in fact a stiff ridged type dancer that might be described as resembling a demented yak break dancing. lol. But our spirits, well that is a whole new thing because it can bust a move quit nicely for the Lord.

So keep on dancing for Him either in your minds eye or in the physical presence!

Praise Him.

Bust a move for Him!

Yes, even bust a move for Him during the bad times.

Never give up! Rest, but don't give up! You MUST keep on keeping on using His strength and not your own! Keep your heart in His hands. Keep on dancing!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QXH0MjGe10s
 and
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6CF2kpe0bU&list=PLZLOMPlM2utGKTKw4cQbPZNnCgMTOI0B-

A Presence There But Not Seen

As I laid in bed last night/real early this morning I felt something putting weight on my bed as if it was walking or crawling towards me from the foot of my bed. I checked and it was NOT my dogs or kids. Nothing and no one was on the bed with me.

I prayed. I put my arm where I last felt whatever it was moving. It was gone. I went back to sleep.

Today while driving alone in the car with no kids or pets I felt something in the back seat behind me "kneading" the seat pushing on it. I prayed for God to remove whatever it was if it was not from Him. It stopped and I went on my happy way to a family function.

No, Im not a lunatic. I am in the hear and now while still getting these strange "glimpses" of the mostly unseen spiritual world around us. Why? I don't know for sure, but aint nothing taking my spirit out of the hands of Jesus. My soul and spirit is deep with in His grasp and there isn't a thing taking it out.

Swamp and Fire

Last night I dreamed I lived in a new house on a road and area of the country or world I did not know. It had a swamp at the end of the road that contained alligators in it.

My little dog got in that swamp and I was driving a pick up truck pulling a trailer and its door came unlatched so I stopped to fix that and yelled down at the swamp for my dog to get out of the swamp before a gator got it and he came up the hill to me like he always does. He had been trying to chase me down the road because I had forgotten to take him with me which is why he was in the dangerous but not deep swamp.

I ended up back at my house (my house in that dream anyways) where I  saw a large fire as I was driving back to my house. I got there and stood in the my front yard and watched where up on the hill was a giant tall grain silo and a grain mill where a huge silos was on fire and threatening to topple over and down the hill wiping out the homes and people in its path. I tried getting my husband to agree to pack the kids and pets up to get out of there until the danger passed, but he refused and instead kept himself busy with mundane meaningless things ignoring the extreme danger just like he does so often real life in a spiritual since.

The people in the other homes kept going outside to look up the hill at the fire. They refused to realize that a big danger was right there in their faces. None of the emergency workers came and evacuate the neighborhood even though they should have. The fire got bigger and the massively tall silo was starting to burn in half and was going to come rolling and bouncing right smack down on the homes and people as they ever so stupidly watched it happen. I was frustrated with them.

The dream ended.
----------------------------------------------------------
The dream indicates to me how we human beings choose to be so stinking spiritually blinded where we cant see the Truth and know when danger is in our path. We just keep on doing what it is that we do while the danger gets closer and closer to us.

Praising The Nurse.

I dreamed I was some kind of special nurse. Crowds of people kept following me outside making repeated remarks about how I was a nurse. They kept wanting to get close to me. Everyone likes a bit of acknowledgement but this was too much.
They kept praising me as if I was something really special and had did some great work, but in my heart I knew I was just a human being and didn't deserve the excessive praise. I was not comfortable with hoards of people holding me so high.

Unloved Females and Native Americans.

Most of my adult life I have felt like God doesn't seem to love females as much. I look at how during ancient Biblical times females were treated as if they did not matter. Kings would have tons of female sex slaves known as concubines. I've heard male teachers excuse this practice as "just the way it was back then" excuses. But just because a certain practice has become the norm does not make it an excusesable practice! Wrong is wrong no matter the time frame and cultrure.

But it was not God being cruel to the females it was humans doing it all. We still see the abuse of females today especially in the Middle East and Asia. Still sex slavery exist except for now it is under ground and no longer an allowable thing legally.

I've seen churches misunderstand the Bible and twist Bible verses and use that as an excuse to not use females for anything other then cleaning the church toilets and working in the nursery. What they have done is a shame and they have missed out on many blessings because of it.

Tonight, once again, I was telling God how I feel that He does not love me and other females as much as men even though my spirit knows He does. But still I sometimes feel unloved as a female. My feelings and spirit often conflict each other. But never the less an emotion is an emotion and can still be strong and moving.

This year I have learned to ask God to talk to me via visual means because that is how I can better understand. So I did that again tonight after telling Him of the hurt I feel over females being abused so much with in many churches and around the world. I told Him I was not feeling so loved by Him since I was a female.

Suddenly in my minds eye I saw myself as a Native American female (thus is my ancestry) standing there wrapped in the historical and typical buck skin wrap for warmth and protection. Sadness was on my face. I was alone in the darkness.

Then He came to me. I saw Him as a colorless being, transparent. He was behind me and reached His arms around me to hold  and comfort me. This made me happy and I got a smile as I held onto my wrap and stretched out my arms making it look as if I was stretching my wings.

I then began to dance Native American style as the Lord danced with me. It was good. He was dancing with me happily and I with Him. I have tears in my eyes as I type this because it touches me. For centuries people portraying Christians harmed and abused the Native Americans thus making most modern natives not wanting anything to do with Jesus. But Jesus Himself loves the natives and does not want them to be abused.

The Lord was happily pow wow dancing with me in my Native regalia and it was all good :)



The Christian Native American  music artists known as Broken Walls touches me. Here is a link to a few of their youtube songs and so some other links:

My favorite sounding one 1st:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YRj0WMTF6Y
And
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0HpG4yRtsRk
And
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VF7VvoM9Vwo

http://www.indianlife.org/index.php
and
http://www.newspaper.indianlife.org/

A friends demented evil father harrassing me and my loving dad called to rescue me.

Last night I did not sleep well due to a health issue waking me up off and on all night long. During the few hours that I did actually sleep well I had a disturbing dream.

I was with an old school friend in what was supposed to be her bedroom in a 2 or 3 story house in the upstairs out in the country that was on the same land/property the house was that I lived in for the 1st 7 years of my life. The outside of the house had lots of piles of junk, old cars, etc.. I saw the placement of her bed and various things in her room. Her and I was hiding in there from her dad. The dad in the dream did not look or sound like her real dad.

The room was like our protection, but he found me in her room though and began harassing me yelling at me, threatening me telling the vile things he wanted to do to me and tried to handle me and I fought back. He was saying that he was saving me for later to molest me. I looked at my friend and she was acting as if this was normal behavior for her dad and was going through her top dresser drawer as if he wasn't actually yelling and threatening.

I continued to fight back. Her mother (who also did not look like her real mother) came into the room after the dad left and went about the room doing housework and talking about how her husband was just like that and that is how it is. She was nervously flitting about the room doing stuff and talking fast. I knew she was not going to try and protect me because she was too beat down after years of being in a marriage to an abusive controlling awful man.

By this point we were trapped up in that room. I kept trying to use a phone to call my dad to come save me.  I had to fiddle with the land line phone cord to make the phone work well enough to make a call. Finally I got to a phone after much difficulty and got it to work after having to call home over and over.

I finally got out of the house and was on the highway facing home. On both sides of the highway were tall cornfields. A patch of tall healthy looking dark green corn was growing in the highway. I hid in it and watched for my dad waiting for him to hurry and get there. I just knew that he was gonna be my savior and get me away from my friends horrid dad. My friend didn't seem to want to escape, to her the abuse was a normal thing I guess. I felt such good and safe feelings about my dad and how much I loved him and how everything was gonna be alright once he got there to take me home to safety.

At some point in the dream the house transformed into a church type place and in place of the friends bedroom became a larger room with bench seats where church services were held. It seemed like all the church goers were fat and female. Mostly female anyways.

The church goers kept reassuring me that I was not in error.

During church services me and all the other ladies were wearing the exact same outfits but mine was ripped up and too immodest for my taste which made me uncomfortable and I tried leaving the service to find something else to cover up with. I was then in my friends bedroom looking for some kind of clothing when her dad shows up yelling again.

Queen of Harts.

After being in the house all day weak from a health issue I decided to go outside this evening to read my Bible and pray and get some fresh air.

I prayed something like "God what do you want show me?"

When I closed my eyes I suddenly saw playing cards (like a deck of cards) forming a hart and suddenly in the middle of the heart the Queen-of-harts card appeared.

I don't know for sure what it means but it was comforting. :)

Soooo Confused

All my life I knew I was different and God has been revealing things to me slowly along the way so that when I finally meet up with someone who knows about weirdo's like me their words are confirmed. I say weirdo's in a joking manner :)

I tend to doubt a lot. A doubting Thomas. I don't want to go against God. I pray often saying "Lord don't let me say or do it if it is not right"

I hear differing options from various people many of which are educated intelligent people not some strange off the wall far out there nuts. The more I hear the more confused I am. The less I hear the more I doubt. A catch 22 I guess.

A few times this summer I have had what I call sensory overload where there was so many visuals I had to just try and stop them by focusing on something else. Are those from God? Are they from my imagination? Are they from the enemy? I really need an anointed Christian godly seer to take council with. I am NOT saying I am a seer but some of the gifting is similar to that of a seer which is why I think  Godly (only a godly one) seer could help me. Don't get the word seer mixed up with soothsaying and witchcraft by the way. If you know your Bible prophets then you know which ones were seers.

My new pastor and friend has been of great help as have been the people in my new church. God has used them to confirm many things and to help propel me into using my gifting more and in better ways for Him. Now I am in need a Christian with the seer gifting from God. Like an older person who has lived it for years and used it for God for decades. Where to find such a person? I dunno. Some are online like Jonathan Welton and I have listened to his youtube stuff and am currently reading his excellent book. I still have questions and concerns. New things are happening. Why did the western church lose its believe in the spiritual gifts?

Even though my human longings and curiosity is wanting a godly human seer to help me I know in my heart that God is my main trainer. Only He is 100% correct. If no one were to ever cross my path to teach me God would and does.

I have chosen to step out in faith by doing this blog even though It is not under my real name. Right now I don't want to deal with the persecution from both believers and non due to my so called weird gifting of dreams/visions/mental pictures.

I guess I often need confirmation to know I am not doing witchcraft in any way.

This confusion comes and goes. I pray. I go on.

The things I see. The things I sometimes hear. The things I dream. The things I feel. Where does it all come from? Sometimes that is the question that plagues me due to my fear of going against the Lord. I just cant knowingly allow my spirit to go against Jesus.

Are the people in my life who are teaching me about the spiritual gifts correct? Are they anointed to do so? Is it a cult? Am I falling for a bunch of garbage? Am I helping others? Am I a burden? Am I a hindrance to someone? What am I doing correct? What am I doing wrong?
I know it is not an occult but you can understand some of my very conflicting emotions and thought processes.

I wonder often what good do these visuals do? I pray for the person. When I tell the visual to someone does it help them? I don't wanna harm anyone. I don't wanna say "God showed me that...." unless I know for 100% that it was from God. Ho do I know 100% that is was from God?
So then I claim up and live in fear of going against God. Then I start saying things and worry that I am not doing something right and going against God by speaking. I also fear I might be sinning if I don't speak and share the visuals.

What to do?

I need clarity.

I need to feel that clarity and not just know it in my head. I need to feel God's assurance.

Oh Lord help me know the answers for I am confused so much of the time. Lord help me to not go against You and to not tell a visual to others if it is not meant to be told. Help me to know what visuals are from You, from me and from demonic forces.

Sometimes I am rather clear in my thinking and know while other times I am not. I do believe there must be a serious spiritual war waging around me at times trying to prevent me from knowing my full potential in the Lord. I think all we Christians must have issues with that. The enemy doesn't want for us to have full knowledge of our gifting so that we cant use it for Jesus.

Thankfully Jesus is the Winner and via the Power of Jesus I will win!

Jesus is the Lord God and came in the flesh and died for our sins and arose from death paying the price so that we did not have to. But Jesus does not force Himself onto others, we must choose Him of our own free will. I have chosen Him.

I saw her death while others waited around planning for it.

Last night I had a very disturbing dream about a relative. This relative is in her 40s and one of those all around nice gentle ladies who loves her children, the Lord and her husband. She is a Christian and I have no doubt about that.

But in the dream she was sometimes her modern self and sometimes a younger version of herself. It went back and forth. She was living in a small apartment above some kind of trashy bar that had something to do with topless waitresses or nude dancing or something I don't know for sure but whenever people in the dream spoke of where she lived they referred to the bar as a place where "boobs" were showed.

She owned or had something to do with some kind of flower shop or whatever which she ran out of her apartment.

In the dream part of the time I was amongst  a few of my often seen summer time peers mixed in with strangers and scattered others. Also in the dream often was a man, who is in my age range, I grew up being friends with and was close to.

In real life the 2 peopl in the dream live states apart from each other and as far as I know have nothing in common or any mutual friends, etc.

In the dream I knew she was about to die in a terrible apartment fire and die the worse way which is burning to death but the others in her apartment (just her kids I think-the husband did not seem to be in the dream) were to make it out alive. In the dream I kept mourning and grieving as I went along in the dream doing whatever it is we all kept doing. Sometimes in the dream others seemed to also know that she was about to die in the fire as some people were preparing for it. But most people did not know. Those of us who knew would always be asking each other things like "did it happen yet?" and other details.

I don't know why those of us who knew it was gonna happen did not try and prevent it. We just seemed to accept that it was gonna happen and that's that. In the dream I kept looking for and wanting that childhood male friend to try and come rescue her or at least to be around to help with the funeral arrangements after it was gonna happen. Her children escaped the fire some how. In the dream the point was often made how her death was as a result of burning to death. It was always night time in the dream. Never could sunshine be seen.

Me and the few others who knew it was gonna happen kept asking about it wondering if it happened yet as we waited around. We talked about her, her life, the upcoming funeral and how sad this all was. Despite the over whelming sadness many others were standing around outside in groups  joking as if nothing bad was about to happen and even after her death they did this even though they claimed to know her and love her. I kept wanting and asking for the childhood male friend to come fix all the funeral arrangements for her and to just plain make things better.

The childhood male friend kept coming into the dream at various points.
-the end of the dream----------

Normally Id think that perhaps she is not saved and is in danger of dying and going to hell all while others around her just ignore that fact and don't try and tell her how to go to Heaven. But that is not the case with this dream. I have no idea at this point why those 2 seemingly unrelated people both of who I rarely ever see or talk to anymore would have such key rolls in the dream.

All I know to do is pray for them.

Touching The Object and Seeing A Glimpse Of Their Suffering.

Often I have said that I wish we had the ability to touch an old object and be able to see what all it as saw throughout its lifetime.

This summer I had the opportunity to tour a historical landscape where a lot of death occurred due to warring.

I prayed asking for some mental picture as to some of the things that happened there so I could better understand it all.

I touched the rocks and boulders on the historical landscape that was still there centuries ago.

I saw some mental pictures and quick flashes of some of the horrid heart wrenching things that happened there due to the warring.

I saw how after the battle the living tried to gather up the badly decaying dead humans. When someone grabbed the hands of a dead solder and began pulling their body off the battlefiel their top off broke off from their lower half due to advanced decay.

A young soldier boy was hiding between 2 boulders that had another bolder over top of it as if it were a roof. He saw his friends being slaughtered and had blood on him from a friend who died. He shook with fear and looked about worried with wide eyes. One of the soldiers on the enemy's side approached the boy's hiding spot and saw his fear and youthfulness of about ages 12-14 maybe. The "enemy" had compassion on the boy and told him to stay put and quiet and to act dead for his own protection.

The place emitted a since of dread, sadness and even a still quietness that felt heavy to people or at least some people as I could see from their faces.

Those are the ones that stick with me in my memory. I cant remember the other ones right now.

War ruins lives and just plain sucks!

My Missions Statement and Announcement that I am not a psychic, wiccan, mystic, witch or pagan of any sort. Only Jesus IS my Lord!

The short version:
I have no power other then the power of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I accept and believe that Jesus is God and came in the flesh born to a virgin who later on died for our sins and arose from death paying the ultimate price for us.
Most of these mental pictures/visions/dreams/mental videos are pertaining to me due to not wanting to type out all the ones I see for others due to time and their privacy although I do sometimes type out some about others.

-----------------------The longer version below------------------------------


I need to and want to make it clear that I am not a psychic, wiccan, mystic, witch, druid or pagan nor do I wish to be. I do not abhor the people who practice those ungodly religions. I do not hate them. I do not wish them ill will, but I do not agree with who they serve and I want nothing to do with their beliefs and practices.

I believe that each human being is gifted with their own unique special gifting from God that is befitting for them. As humans we have the freedom to serve either Good (Jesus) or evil (satan and his demons).I believe that most people who partake in the above mentioned religions often do not purposely set out to serve satan and if they realized that they were they would not wish to continue doing so. But we have a choice. We can choose God or not and it would appear that most people with the special more uncommon prophetic gifting choose to serve satan (some knowingly and some unknowingly) because they were turned away by the churches.

Sadly in many instances over the centuries well meaning but seriously wrong, judgmental and unloving Christians have used the name of the Lord to abuse, torture and kill the people in the afore mentioned religions. Their sudden and strong hatred of those people was no doubt fueled by fear, paranoia and rumors. And it some cases they had legitimate reasons to fear some of those people of those religions due to some people having the ability to use their pophetic gifting for evil in terribly powerful ways.

Anyways because of the centuries of abuse from both sides warring at each other today we can still see the affects. When the non saved think that the all saved people are judgmental, holier then thou ridged stick in the mud legalist slamming on everyone then why would anyone think it is a good thing to serve the Lord?  Sadly those people lack the Truth and they allow their past hurts to blind them spiritually. If only they would choose to see through the blindness and to see that serving the Lord, the real Lord, our Creator and Savior is the real way and the only good way.

satan and his demons and the people who serve them come in many disguises and can even appear good and kind and so understanding. This makes it confusing for hurting people and leads them astray creating strong ties and loyalties.

No matter what our gifts are we can choose to use them for the Lord or not. That means signing, music, teaching and many more. Who do you choose to use it for?

Throughout my life I have been drawn to evil practices and interested in them. I know I have the ability to use "magic" (for a lack of a better word sorry) to harm others and knowingly did so 2 times in my youth which I am ashamed of and have prayed many times for forgiveness and for the people I hurt to be blessed and saved and freed from any curse I placed on them in any way. I knew it was wrong and instantly asked God for help and forgiveness never doing it again. I just knew it was not of God and what is not of God is not good. But some how I knew what to do to get what I wanted. I was being drawn to the dark side as are all people with prophetic gifting. But we can be strong minded and choose to not work for the dark side.

Now in my older and wiser years I am seeing my faithfulness to not give up on God and to keep holding onto Him blessing me. No I am not perfect. I still mess up. I have more learning and growing to do. I was not and have not been perfect, but I always believed and never let go. Now God is showing me how to use my gifting better.

 I constantly fear that I might be doing something sinful and against God with my prophetic gifting. I don't ever want to fall into doing witch craft. My legalistic religious upbringing still whispers shame, guilt and distrust into my ears making me slow to accept the full gospel and my own gifting and that of other prophetic Christians.

But despite my many imperfections God keeps on keeping on with me. Just as He does for you and as He did for King David who seemed to always mess things up in a giant way.

So yes I dream, have visions, see mental pictures, feel things, etc. but I do not do it for evil or money. I often pray prayers like this "Lord don't let me say or do something that is not of you when it comes to the mental pictures, dreams and so on. Don't let me say it, do it or write it if I am mistaken and it is not correct. Don't let me unknowingly fall into witchcraft"

Now, after so long, I am finally beginning to trust that the Lord is hearing and honoring that prayer.

I have chosen to not use my real name in this blog due to the still extreme false teachings with in western churches. There is still so much judgment towards Christians whose gifting is on the "different" scale. We seemed to have fallen into a trap thinking that the only acceptable gifts are singing, teaching and preaching and that anyone without those gifts are basically peons. There is no child of God who is a peon. All children of God have special gifting of some sort but most don't know it and it gets suppressed and not used.

But now, today, western Christians are beginning to see the Truth.

Jesus who is God and the son of God came in the flesh to become human of a miracle virgin birth to teach humans and die for our sins so that if we choose Him of our own free will we don't have to go to hell. And then 3 days after He died for us He rose from the dead.
I believe in the Holy Trinity.
Jesus is my savior,  my Lord, my Redeemer, my Protecter and Strengh, my Forgiver and the true and real lover of my soul.

Mental picture over load. One was close to being too powerful, it stirred my emotions.

At church on June 30, 2013 Sunday I had arrived too early so I sat outside the church reading and praying for a little bit. I prayed that I would see more good stuff and instead of mostly only the bad stuff like I usually do.

Instantly I saw a golden white line outlining the top of a bowling alley and bar. That didn't make any since to me, why would a place where the towns people with severally  bad moral choices hang out be lined in the gold and bright white that I so often see with Christians and those especially anointed?

The thought came to me that Jesus died for them too! There are some Christians in there as well. Why shouldn't God bless a place and those people as well? I confessed my judgmentalism.

In church a regular attender brought a friend to church with him. She walked in and the typical pleasantries were exchanged like "hi my name is ____ how are you?"

Then I saw all kind of multicolored beautiful flowers growing out of her back and happily swaying. I thought that was befitting of her because already I could tell she was a kind hearted soul. A bit later I saw like a see through image of Jesus standing directing in front of her about 2 feet away maybe. I saw Jesus reach through her chest and pick one of the white flowers from her back and He then pulled the flower through her chest and out her body and held it in His hands as He smelled its lovely fragrance and smiled with pleasure.

It was a powerful mental picture to me because it was Jesus Himself. The visual was so emotionally sensitive that I started crying as I told her about it later. To see Jesus enjoying a human being so much. It still makes me teary eyed. It came over me off and on and there for a bit I thought maybe I should silently walk out of church and walk home so I could cry like a baby because I felt kind of overwhelmed and needed to cry but not in a sad or bad way.

I'm not sure why that visual came so strong for that young lady but it did. I don't know what her gifts or life story is. She walks with those crutches things where it braces her arms and I notice her one leg (perhaps) both had some kind of brace on it.  I don't know what her aliment is but it doesn't matter anyways. Whatever and whoever she is she has an extra special blessing of some sort about her. I know she is still a human and sins and like us all has probably did her share of mistakes but none of us can ever be perfect and that doesn't prevent us from receiving blessings. And like God loved King David so much even though he kept messing up God has apparently chosen to have some extra love for that young lady too. The happy pleased look on Jesus face was so intense.

I was having a ton of visuals. A lot. So many I could not write the all down or tell them. I was starting to feel like it was getting to be a bit too much.

I only told 2 of them, 1 to the young lady and the other to a young man. I saw a golden white vine coiling around the young man's right leg then once it got to his torso it turned green and leafy and wrapped around once. I knew it was meant as a "it's gonna be ok" type of thing and told him so. Later on he told me that his right leg has suddenly been hurting him badly this week for un known reasons and one day it was so bad he could hardly walk.

Another visual I remember was the pastor had 3 long golden white "spears" going through him at a slant. The spears lifted him up to the ceiling and held him there like a hammock kind of. To me that means a special comfort for the Lord I think?

I saw music notes as if they were flowers as they were on stems coming off the guitar and swaying during the songs. Music notes also danced about around the 2 guitars and on the wall in front of us as well as golden white linings.

There was a lot more. I don't remember them all. Too much to type out. But the young man confirming what I saw as helped encourage me because I had been praying for some kind of confirmation and to know that I'm not doing anything sinful and wrong with my visuals. I don't want to go against God.

The young lady's visual still affects me but not in a bad way. I shall be thinking of and pondering on that and the visual of the young man and his words this week.

I pray for total healing of the young man. I have also prayed blessings (more then she already has) on that young lady, and protection for her and even healing.

Randy Alcock Who Are You?

Last night I had a long dream. Id wake up several times throughout the night and the dream would continue on once I fell back to sleep.

I don't remember much of the dream other then I kept hearing the name Randy Alcock all throughout the dream and at one point someone (I don't know who) handed me a black marker so I could write out the name Randy Alcock. I was told in the dream to not forget that name but I don't know why.

In the dream at 1st I thought it was referring to my junior high gym teacher because his name was Mr Alcock but upon futher thoughts I don't think his 1st name was Randy. In fact Im pretty sure it was not.

Well whoever Randy Alcock is I'm praying for him for whatever reason.

Alone and Running Towards Darkness

Often I get mental pictures. That's just my thing and the way God made me. Only this year have I learned that I can sit back and relax with eyes closed and pray asking God what He has for me.
Tonight this is what He had for me:

I was in a long but not wide factory that had work tables with over head lights above each work table/bench. The over head lamp like things above each work bench was painted blue.I don't know what the factory made.

I was alone. The big room had no other humans in it.

Suddenly one of those things that  look like some kind of large air ducts or tubes or whatever appeared on the wall right where the ceiling is like we see with those air things in some businesses and place of work. It was building itself and adding onto its self very quickly and I got the urge to follow it. So I began running after it as it continued to grow alone where the ceiling and wall meet.

It lead to the other end of the factory where there was a large opening in the wall that revealed nothing but pitch blackness. I came to a halt not wanting to run into and follow that air thingy into that darkness that I knew did not feel right.

So what does all that mean? I don't know for sure.

It might be representative  of how I am so often alone in spiritual matters. Why was I running and following the air thingy? Does it possibly mean I easily fall for and run along with that which is in error? Or could it mean that certain influences and situations in life could have easily lead me into giving up and falling into deep sin which was the darkness and me almost running into it.

Spiritually Blinded Husband and When I See Gold I know It Is Of God

So often with the mental pictures I will see Christians with a gold thread or a gold lining and other forms of gold near them, on them or outlining their body or sometimes coming off of them and sometimes attached to some thing or some one else.

I think it usually means there is some kind of special anointing there or like a special work of God going on at the time. I also think it can be seen in anyone who has chosen Jesus and not just specially anointing ones.

The other day I saw a gold lining out lining my husband's body but coming off the surface of his entire body was dark rays of demonic influence and forces.

No my husband is not some kind of raving lunatic out there drugging and drinking it up. He is a faithful husband who works hard to provide for us. But his blood line from his father is not good. Im sure many of his dad's family are not evil but it only takes a few to mess things up. His dad was abusive and mean and voiced how he hated Jesus and forbid talk of Him. Weird things occurred and much violence and abuse took place which placed in my husband a deep psychological dysfunction that is quit evident to others, well actually many assume he is just a jerk while others see through that and see that something is not right but they don't know why.

I believe the dark rays represent the cursed blood line, unconfessed and unrepentant sins and the deep psychological damage done. It is almost as if the gold lining is protecting him from further attacks from demonic forces but it cant heal him of the damage of it all until he chooses to say "yes I want healed", but unless he sees that he needs healed or unless he chooses to reach out for help I fear he is stuck in limbo just hanging out spiritually, and that is harmful to me and the kids.

Sexual Filth and Prophetic Dreaming Or A Nightmare Brought About By My Worries For Some Of My Relatives.

In a previous post I had explained a vision I had about some of my relatives who are in serious spiritual bondage and don't even realize it. In the vision I saw that bright white sword making an arch of protection over them.

Over this past weekend I had a dream about 1 of those families and how filthy immoral sex was their main issues as if it were some kind of generational curse and probably is. I dreamed that the curse and main issue lay with the mother and teenaged girls in that family during this time but I know it goes back even farther. The father isn't the spiritual leader and does not live in the same house. In fact there is no spiritual anything good it would appear from looking in from the outside.

Any ways in the nightmare an unseen filthy sexual force was harassing the mother and teenaged daughters. One of them or perhaps all were in grave danger due to the sexual immorality and curse,but I don't know if that means spiritually or physically. I don't know which one was in the main danger.

I don't know what that all means for sure. It cold mean an STD or an unwanted pregnancy. Or it could mean further annulation of what little bit of spiritual integrity they may have which means their very souls are in danger.

Don't get me wrong I don't think sex is bad or filthy. It is a good thing God invented for us but only if done with in the right parameters which is with in marriage and ONLY with our spouse, other wise when done outside of God's commandments it leads to terrible things like STDs, molestations, rapes, peeping toms, adultery, prostitution and other forms of sexual perversion.

The devil took what God made to be good (sex) and made it into vile things like porn, sex crimes, adultery and so on. The devil and his demons have been good at doing that, they take what God made for good and distort it making it into something evil.

Im not the parent of the teens in the family above. I have no legal grounds to tell them the danger I see for their teen girls. I have made remarks off and on and said some things attempting but to no avail. All I can do is pray for them. Whatever the curse is on them goes back as far as the great-great-grandpa from what I know of and perhaps father back. The sexual filth of adultery literally goes from generation to generation creating screwed up offspring emotionally, mentally, spiritually and morally. They aren't bad people per say, they have been good to me and have helped me. I have had many good times and laughs with them. They would not steal from others or harm others. They are not monsters. They are humans beings with feelings and emotions created by God but choosing to keep living in diabolical sins without the spiritual and mental wherewithal to do anything about it.

What to do?

Swallowed By The Ground

I know I type dreams out that are not in chronological order but I type them out as I remember them. I wish I had been doing this starting many years ago.

This dream took place in about 2009 I think perhaps later. Very possibly 2010.

Swallowed By The Ground
I was in my parent's yard when a large slit opened in the ground making an oblong hole. It was as if the ground under the opening had become hollow. I fell down into the hole and was desperately trying to climb out with no success. It was daylight but the sun was not blazing onto me thanks to the clouds in the pretty blue sky, and no animals where around which is unusual for there. No birds could be heard. All was still. No humans around either, not even the sound of insects such as crickets could be heard. Complete quietness and stillness as I was struggling to survive and rescue myself.


In the dream I strongly felt the emotions of fear and panic. I was screaming over and over for help but no one came. We lived next door to my parents, finally my husband drove up the drive way after getting off work. I screamed and screamed for him to come to my rescue but he never heard or came.

My kids and parents were no where in site. I screamed so loud over and over. I was losing strength quickly as I struggled to try and get out. I was 100% under the ground and could look up and see the opening that revealed the pretty but non-moving sky/clouds. I knew my husband was out there somewhere but he didn't seem to hear me. I was on my own. The more I fought to climb out the more I seemed to sink deeper and deeper as if an invisible force was pulling me down deeper into the earth.

Dream over.

My husband woke me up because I was thrashing about making whimpering noises in my sleep. It was very disturbing and felt so real.

To me some of the interpretation is the fact that so often in life I am alone having to do everything myself and am the only one I can depend on while everyone else is going abouts their own way.

59 cents In Rochester, Indiana.

Last night for unknown reasons I had a dream that I had to drive to a place called
Rochester, Indiana. I don't know anyone who lives there so I'm not sure why I dreamed
of it. I don't know if there is anything special about that place and have no idea why my dream would be about it.  I just felt like I had to drive there so I did.

I don't remember what all happened but I got to Rochester and various weird things happened that left me with a bad feeling. I kind of remember being in buildings and around the town and seeing and feeling a since of sadness or doom around me. For reasons I don't remember I had to leave the city for my own safety and sanity.

As I was driving home my car started acting up so I pulled into a place along the highway that had a restaurant. It wasn't far out of Rochester at all I think. I had no money or cell phone. I went in and asked to use the phone to call for help. The waitress complained and grumbled around about it. I wanted some water to drink but was told a glass of water would cost 59 cents. I had no money.

A disgruntled grouchy rude waitress brought me a glass of water that was 3/4 the way filled with no ice and said something like "here, this is all you get for free!"  Then she decided to not give me the water after all.

During all this a small brown dog was standing by me on its hind legs looking up at me talking to me telling me all I have to do is give 59 cents. It kept talking about 59 cents. I detected something evil about it and knew it was wanting to harm me in some way. Suddenly my brown dog that I've had for 6 years shows up and stays by me. My dog and I walked out of the restaurant without calling home for help due to the rude waitresses and dog preventing me. My dog and I got in the car and I sat at the wheel wondering what to do next.

At that time I heard the voice of my mom as if I were actually talking to her on the phone. I don't remember what she was saying but it had something to do with trying to get the car back on the highway and head home. I remember that I got back on the highway heading home. Everything around seemed too quiet with a lack of movement or sunshine even though it was day time.
The dream ended.

I do not have an interpretation for it right now.

Flesh eating virus, bad virus killing both humans and animals but is being ignored.

Below is the dream I found as an unpublished draft in this blog. I don't even remember this dream much at all. I don't know why it did not get published. I had forgot about his blog for several years not using it hardly at all. Well below is the dream. I'm not sure what the interpretation is other then perhaps the flesh eating deadly virus and society ignoring it stands for the filthy diabolical sins that society now thinks is normal and puts up with. Society now embraces many nasty sins as they are blind to the horrid affects those sins will bring not only upon themselves but the entire environment around them and beyond. We see some of the negative affects of those sins as it brings an entire country down but we ignore the real reasons for the down fall and try and place the blame on other things as we try to apply useless salve to the wounds or ignoring them all together.
A example of some embraced sins:

-the need for society to have to support not just a few here and there but tons and tons of single parents due to the fathers not taking care of their offspring and due to the parents sleeping around and getting pregnant and unable to support their own families because of it all.
(don't get me wrong I do think it is good that we help the babies/children, they need food, medical care and housing just as we all do. I'm just saying that there is way way way too much sexual sins resulting in our country having to spend out money to take care of it all.

-also we not only embrace disrespecting our bodies by sleeping around we also seem to think it is ok to cheat on our spouses or having a relationship with a married person. I am sickened at how not only non-Christians but even Christian marriages are divorcing over adultery in large amounts. Do we really think that is going to turn out well in the long run?

-Honor. Where is the honor these days? We don't honor our elders or anyone near as much as we should. To honor does not mean we have to agree with them and be their slave doing whatever they say. It means that even though we may or may not agree with them or even like them we still do not talk down to them and stuff like that. To honor someone means we treat them with respect and when possible we help them. Am example of dishonoring them might be when we make fun of them behind their backs slamming on them and bashing on their words, feelings and lifestyles. There is a proper way to disagree with someone without having to bash on them and act as if we are holier than though.

The dream below:


Dream typed out on Sept 24, 2008

I had a dream last night that one of those flesh eating diseases was over taking society.

But it was worse then the flesh eating disease we already know about.

It spread by contact so perhaps it was a virus maybe and not as much of a bacteria.

It started out affecting cats and then other animals and then later on humans. In the dream I tried telling others to be careful and not touch those affected without gloves, gowns and masks on.

People would not listen and they kept touching the affected ones and going about their lives. I thought the affected ones should be quarantined so that they could not spread it around to others like they unknowingly were. But no one else seemed to think so.

I kept seeing flesh that had been eaten away in large patches with the deadly flesh eating infection. It was eaten away so much in some cases that the organs could be seen pumping and functioning.

Still not to many people were worried about it and they kept going on in life as if it was not that big of a deal.

More got affected by it and walked about as if it was almost normal or something.

Darkness On My Back Blocking The Golden Rain Of God's Love

I am currently reading a book by a man named Jonathan Welton called "The School Of The Seers".
At the end of each chapter is what is called an activation. The best way I know how to explain is that an activation is a practice tool to do in order to learn how it all works.

I finished the chapter last night where the activation said to ponder on and think of how God loves us. I mean true love like He has for everyone. But it was real late at night and when I closed my eyes to think on God's love I fell asleep. So this morning I remembered and began pondering on it.

Immediately  without delay the mental picture (some call it a vision) was there. It was of me. Raining only on me was a golden colored rain with a sparkly glistening in it coming directly down on me, but I was bending over with an area of darkness that stayed directly on my back. I was bent down the entire time trying to look back and up at the golden rain. I kept moving around trying to make the dark thing come off my back and get out of the way, but it stayed on me strongly refusing to get off..

The interpretation:
The beautiful golden sparkly rain was God's love pouring down on me.
The dark thing on my back was anything from a demonic presence to emotional/mental issues preventing me from feeling the full impact of God's love.
Me bending over, moving around as I was bent over and me looking back and up at the rain was me trying to shake the darkness off of me, and me trying to look past the in-the-way annoying darkness on my back so I could see and feel a better view of God's love. I wanted to get that darkness off of me so the rain would wash over me absorbing into my skin and washing me clean. Yes I have Jesus in my heart and He is my Great Savior that has forgiven all my past, present and future sins. But I cant seem to feel the Love.

What might that dark presence on my back represent? I dont know for sure.
I know some of it is probably from my inability to fully feel love for unknown reasons. When someone acts like or says they like me and enjoys my presence I normally assume they are just saying that to be nice, but if they really knew me they would no longer like me because I'm so annoying and boring. Me feeling like I am annoying was backed up by an older type A personality woman who directly told me I am annoying and others don't like being around me a few years ago. Her words have stuck with me and gone deep into my soul even though I have forgiven her. I have forgiven but cant forget :(

Another reason why I cant feel God's love is probably from the legalism I was raised with. I have good parents who love the Lord. I have many good memories of my child hood so I'm not complaining. But as with all things on this earth amidst the good will be the bad too. I was raised with religious legalism that left me with feelings of shame and guilt like it does for most folks.

I could not be good enough. I could not sing or play music. I was not good at sports and memorizing tons of Bible verses. I just seemed useless in the church. And I just could not behave perfect enough. I was never good enough. Whenever I or other people were being talked about for their sins and mistakes the sinners and myself were talked about as terrible shameful people who are basically useless. Emotional and mental abuse is what it is.

Don't get me wrong my parents did not abuse me. My dad was not legalistic, but my mom was. She comes from a family where it isn't uncommon to hear conversations where others were considered to be shameful. Yes her family is a good family but they had their issues like every other family.

I'm glad to say that these days in my mom's elderly years she has been breaking free of religious legalism and shame based thought processes. She has come a long way and I am so glad for her. My dad is also a great person whom I am close with.

Now, how do I feel God's love fully?My head knowledge says "yes God loves me", but my emotions/feelings don't feel it.
Over the past several years I've prayed that any generational curses on me be broke off of me. I've grown spiritually and keep growing. I still sin yes but I've been doing much better as the conviction comes over me to not do such and such sin. I read my Bible and ask for forgiveness of my transgressions almost daily. But still I don't feel it? How to feel it?
I know it but cant fully feel His Love. There are times where I have felt it for a very short time, I want to feel that Love all the time.